I'm moving out of my house this week. Tomorrow, we're packing up the U-Haul and Thursday is officially "move-out day". It's really sad boxing up all my memories. I didn't know I had so many. Everything is neatly labeled and ready to go and it causes me to think. What new memories am I going to make in California? What does God have in store for me? Moving out is so final. My time living out home, mooching off my parents, and the days of free laundry and food are over. I won't have my room to come to when I visit. Instead, it's becoming a workout room.
Even though I'm sad about moving out, I know that our Father has amazing plans for me! This year of internship is going to be really scary and difficult, but it holds great adventures just waiting to be discovered! I am so ready to live on my own, pay my own bills (not really), make my own decisions. I'm ready to be lonely, broken, and totally humbled, waiting for my Savior to strengthen me. I am constantly repeating the mantra of Paul, "Where I am weak, then I am strong." God is strength in me. It's okay if I don't sum up or I'm not perfect in ministry. I'm not supposed to be! But, instead, God will be the One lifting me up, giving me courage, wisdom, and strength. I am so excited to be weak!!
The more I think about the journey ahead of me, the more excited I get! I know that God is preparing me to be a great DCE, wife, mother, whatever lays ahead in my future. All of this is preparation for those roles I might play in my life. I don't know what's going to happen and for some reason, it's okay. I have faith and trust in the Lord.
So, with every box I pack up and tape, this chapter in my life comes closer to an end. But, when I move to California, every box I open and unwrap will open the next chapter! May God continue to be with me as I trust in His amazing grace, strength, and salvation.
Prov. 3:5-6
Zephaniah 3:17
Many Blessings,
<><
P.S. Everything is going great with Barna. It's difficult being away still, but we'll see what God has planned. I'll keep you posted.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Relationships are Hard
I've discovered quite recently (obviously) that being in a relationship is difficult.
No, scratch that. . . Being in an intercontinental, bilingual, entire-ocean-in-between-us, uber long distance relationship is difficult!
Even though this thing is hard, I'm having a great time getting to know someone for who they are, without the distraction of physical intimacy in the way. Don't get me wrong, I like being intimate. However, intimacy doesn't always have to be physical. You can feel close to someone through emotional and spiritual intimacy as well. Sometimes this might be even more meaningful.
I've been able to discover this recently and it's been amazing! I like being able to have the opportunity to work on communication, to get to know someone for who they are and not how you feel when you're around them. I admit, I get butterflies and chills when I'm talking on the phone with Barna. It feels great to see an e-mail from him in my Inbox. However, knowing that I'm building a solid relationship with him that is founded on trust and Christ makes the distance not seem so bad.
Yes, this is difficult. Probably one of the hardest things God has put in my life thus far. But, all the more to prepare me for whatever crazy and creative plans he has for me (or us) in the future! I know that God is molding Barna and I to do incredible things for the glory of the Kingdom. Whether this is together or apart, only God knows. I keep asking, by the way, and He's not budging on the whole "be still and know that I am God" thing. . .
This relationship thing is new for me. And, I definitely do NOT know all of the answers. However, God is showing me so many new things about my faith through Barna. It amazes me how his faith encourages mine and often he has no idea. (Note to self: tell him!) I find a soft stirring to dig deeper and find answers in my Bible, even though I've read the story a million times. Barna helps me see where passion lies. Even if faith is only mustard seed sized, it can still move Everest.
<><
No, scratch that. . . Being in an intercontinental, bilingual, entire-ocean-in-between-us, uber long distance relationship is difficult!
Even though this thing is hard, I'm having a great time getting to know someone for who they are, without the distraction of physical intimacy in the way. Don't get me wrong, I like being intimate. However, intimacy doesn't always have to be physical. You can feel close to someone through emotional and spiritual intimacy as well. Sometimes this might be even more meaningful.
I've been able to discover this recently and it's been amazing! I like being able to have the opportunity to work on communication, to get to know someone for who they are and not how you feel when you're around them. I admit, I get butterflies and chills when I'm talking on the phone with Barna. It feels great to see an e-mail from him in my Inbox. However, knowing that I'm building a solid relationship with him that is founded on trust and Christ makes the distance not seem so bad.
Yes, this is difficult. Probably one of the hardest things God has put in my life thus far. But, all the more to prepare me for whatever crazy and creative plans he has for me (or us) in the future! I know that God is molding Barna and I to do incredible things for the glory of the Kingdom. Whether this is together or apart, only God knows. I keep asking, by the way, and He's not budging on the whole "be still and know that I am God" thing. . .
This relationship thing is new for me. And, I definitely do NOT know all of the answers. However, God is showing me so many new things about my faith through Barna. It amazes me how his faith encourages mine and often he has no idea. (Note to self: tell him!) I find a soft stirring to dig deeper and find answers in my Bible, even though I've read the story a million times. Barna helps me see where passion lies. Even if faith is only mustard seed sized, it can still move Everest.
<><
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Yes, I'm actually in a relationship!
So, for all of you who are completely puzzled or excited or curious as to my Facebook status, here you go.
Yes, I have a boyfriend, but please be cautious as to not take this in a traditional sense because it is not really a traditional relationship (obviously). Pastor Borst is the man behind the matchmaking and he did a pretty good job. So, props to you, Pastor. During English Camp in Hungary, Barna came by to say "hello" to Pastor and see how camp was doing. We were having a scavenger hunt with the jr. high kids and Pastor was a clue. I had nothing to do, so Pastor invited me and Barna to play poker with him. We had no chips, so it was decided that Barna would go to his house and get them (a quick 10 minutes). He invited Pastor to come along, but he was a clue, so he declined, but proceeded with the following line, "Kelsey can come along with you!" So, after some hesitation (I just met the guy) I accepted. The drive was great. We totally hit it off. Talked about politics, life, Hungarian stuff, etc. Got back to school and Pastor and Barna taught me how to play Texas Hold'em, which Barna totally dominated in. Pastor asked Barna if he had a girlfriend and he said,"No". Awkward, but Yay! He also invited Barna to the 4th of July party we were planning on having. So, he came.
Now is a timeline of our relationship because I don't really feel like typing everything out. So, here are the highlights.
4th of July - Barna, the Hungarian, grilled all the food for the American Independence Day celebration. It was great to get to know him better over steak and beer.
The following Tuesday at high school camp - He helped out with the high schoolers and was awesome!
Thursday - Also helped out a little, but had to work. Looks really good in a tie! :) But, came back for the Disco we had for the kids. He doesn't really dance, but he did a little for me. We had a great time just talking, though.
Friday - Farewell dinner in Aszod. Sad day. Barna and I planned on this being the last time we saw each other, but Pastor asked him to come along to Budapest, so he came! Had a great time getting to know each other after dinner. He danced with me to David Crowder, though. I think he's a winner!
Saturday - Day in Budapest. Had a girls day at the baths. Then, Barna and I saw each other in the evening when I walked him to the train station. Good times.
Sunday - Invited him to come to the Last Supper. Final goodbye. My heart broke, but we decided to make the decision and somewhat commitment to become official. Yes, I saw commitment because it is extremely difficult having a relationship with someone when there's a whole OCEAN between the two of you. But, we'll make it work.
Wow, that was such a fast-paced week. Now, we're just going to slow things down a bit since we have tons of time to do so.
Barna is an incredible man of God and is quickly becoming my best friend. I am so looking forward to seeing what our Creator has in store for the two of us, whether it is together or apart. Please pray for us and that God keeps us strong and patient.
Blessings to all!
><>
Yes, I have a boyfriend, but please be cautious as to not take this in a traditional sense because it is not really a traditional relationship (obviously). Pastor Borst is the man behind the matchmaking and he did a pretty good job. So, props to you, Pastor. During English Camp in Hungary, Barna came by to say "hello" to Pastor and see how camp was doing. We were having a scavenger hunt with the jr. high kids and Pastor was a clue. I had nothing to do, so Pastor invited me and Barna to play poker with him. We had no chips, so it was decided that Barna would go to his house and get them (a quick 10 minutes). He invited Pastor to come along, but he was a clue, so he declined, but proceeded with the following line, "Kelsey can come along with you!" So, after some hesitation (I just met the guy) I accepted. The drive was great. We totally hit it off. Talked about politics, life, Hungarian stuff, etc. Got back to school and Pastor and Barna taught me how to play Texas Hold'em, which Barna totally dominated in. Pastor asked Barna if he had a girlfriend and he said,"No". Awkward, but Yay! He also invited Barna to the 4th of July party we were planning on having. So, he came.
Now is a timeline of our relationship because I don't really feel like typing everything out. So, here are the highlights.
4th of July - Barna, the Hungarian, grilled all the food for the American Independence Day celebration. It was great to get to know him better over steak and beer.
The following Tuesday at high school camp - He helped out with the high schoolers and was awesome!
Thursday - Also helped out a little, but had to work. Looks really good in a tie! :) But, came back for the Disco we had for the kids. He doesn't really dance, but he did a little for me. We had a great time just talking, though.
Friday - Farewell dinner in Aszod. Sad day. Barna and I planned on this being the last time we saw each other, but Pastor asked him to come along to Budapest, so he came! Had a great time getting to know each other after dinner. He danced with me to David Crowder, though. I think he's a winner!
Saturday - Day in Budapest. Had a girls day at the baths. Then, Barna and I saw each other in the evening when I walked him to the train station. Good times.
Sunday - Invited him to come to the Last Supper. Final goodbye. My heart broke, but we decided to make the decision and somewhat commitment to become official. Yes, I saw commitment because it is extremely difficult having a relationship with someone when there's a whole OCEAN between the two of you. But, we'll make it work.
Wow, that was such a fast-paced week. Now, we're just going to slow things down a bit since we have tons of time to do so.
Barna is an incredible man of God and is quickly becoming my best friend. I am so looking forward to seeing what our Creator has in store for the two of us, whether it is together or apart. Please pray for us and that God keeps us strong and patient.
Blessings to all!
><>
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
I just "piddled"!! (Peed a little)
Funny quotes from camp thus far:
- "Daniel is a robot" in reference to Daniel's amazing ability to keep his emotions stuffed down in the pit of his soul during the game "honey, if you love me, please smile"
- "Jesus beat Chuck Norris"
- "Jesus is a Ninja who beat Chuck Norris"
- "What now, horse?"
- "Why are we clapping?" in reference to my absolute cluelessness and word vomit at inappropriate times
- "Opa! Where's my plate?!"
- "Just think of your dead dog!!! Dead Dog!" also during the game, "honey, if you love me. . ."
- "A slap is just a high five in the face!"
- "Hawney, ifa you lawve me...Pleeesa a smile!" Man, I love Hungarians!
- "Darth Katie! Duh, duh, duh, duuh. . . duh, duh, duuh. . . duh, duh, duuh" (Caitlyn) . . . "I wanna' be Princess Feya!" (Jessie Fey) . . . "Okay, but Feya means ugly in Spanish"
- Nutella!
- FOOORRREEEVVVVEEEERRRRRRR!
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Hungry in Hungary
Wow, I'm seriously surprising myself at the fact that I'm able to sit down and actually write something on my blog. This week has been crazy. Fun, but crazy. We're talking no sleep, jr. high girls screaming in Hungarian, and interesting food combinations that I have never even dreamed of. Food Network, boy do I have some tips for you!
I'm here in Aszod, Hungary teaching English and Jesus to jr. high schoolers. We have so many different ranges of English speaking abilities here at camp. Our little 5th graders have only had one year of English. So, think about my level of Hungarian abilities and adapt that idea to their level of English abilities. Not a whole lot of verbal communication going on with them, but they are absolutely precious and have a heart to learn, which is incredible!
We also have the older kids who know a lot of English, but are "too cool" to speak up in class. They sit there, just like American jr highers and twiddle their thumbs, pretending not to care. However, these girls are wonderful leaders and I think we've finally had a break through with them. They are starting to participate in Bible study and class. It's so exciting when they start showing signs of human life and intelligence!
Hungary is a very different place. The people are very "solid" emotionally. Not a whole lot of warmness radiating from them. But, once you get to know them and begin to build a relationship with them, they can be wonderful and supportive people. Ria, the Hungarian teacher who's been helping my Team (White Lightning!) is absolutely amazing! She is quiet, but she wrote me such an encouraging note the other day that I broke down in tears. Me (who shows enough emotion for the entire country of Hungary) crying in front of Ria (who lacks emotion, but is still a passionate girl)...Quite the scene, let me tell you. Wonderful, wonderful people.
Tonight, we're having a Disco / Dance. The kids are excited and so are we. I don't know if we'll have to break up the "dirty dancing" like in the States, but we'll see what happens.
Tomorrow is the last day of camp and the 4th of July! Then, off the Vienna on Saturday with the Concordia group.
Things have been great, but I'm exhausted. Gotta' run and sing some songs!
Blessings!
I'm here in Aszod, Hungary teaching English and Jesus to jr. high schoolers. We have so many different ranges of English speaking abilities here at camp. Our little 5th graders have only had one year of English. So, think about my level of Hungarian abilities and adapt that idea to their level of English abilities. Not a whole lot of verbal communication going on with them, but they are absolutely precious and have a heart to learn, which is incredible!
We also have the older kids who know a lot of English, but are "too cool" to speak up in class. They sit there, just like American jr highers and twiddle their thumbs, pretending not to care. However, these girls are wonderful leaders and I think we've finally had a break through with them. They are starting to participate in Bible study and class. It's so exciting when they start showing signs of human life and intelligence!
Hungary is a very different place. The people are very "solid" emotionally. Not a whole lot of warmness radiating from them. But, once you get to know them and begin to build a relationship with them, they can be wonderful and supportive people. Ria, the Hungarian teacher who's been helping my Team (White Lightning!) is absolutely amazing! She is quiet, but she wrote me such an encouraging note the other day that I broke down in tears. Me (who shows enough emotion for the entire country of Hungary) crying in front of Ria (who lacks emotion, but is still a passionate girl)...Quite the scene, let me tell you. Wonderful, wonderful people.
Tonight, we're having a Disco / Dance. The kids are excited and so are we. I don't know if we'll have to break up the "dirty dancing" like in the States, but we'll see what happens.
Tomorrow is the last day of camp and the 4th of July! Then, off the Vienna on Saturday with the Concordia group.
Things have been great, but I'm exhausted. Gotta' run and sing some songs!
Blessings!
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