here goes...

i thought that this break would be a bit more relaxing than it's been. . . i mean, sans drama.

not the case.

you know when you feel like things are going great in your life & then God says, "not so fast, kels! i still have some interesting plans for you!" WHAM! spiritual 2x4! yeah, that's what this break has been thus far.

okay, story. . . i was content with keeping "someone" distant in my life. coming back to the AZ was supposed to be free of this person. not the case. . . at all. actually, with the help of some people, i managed to put myself in the direct path of said person. he's been having a hard time lately & i know i should be there for him, but i don't want to! i've been hurt too much by this certain someone & i don't want to even slightly open myself up to him again. but, i feel like God may be calling me to forgive & move on. 3 years. wow, it's been 3 years! i need to move on!! i need to look him straight in the eye & not only be completely self confident in my un-attachment from him but to genuinely want to help him in this crappy time of pain for him. why does this have to be so complicated! end of story.

on a slightly happier note, i got most of my christmas shopping done today! oh, how i adore the gift-giving season! anyways, today was actually a full day. i spent countless hours at the mall (wait, am i in the movie "clueless" now or what?!), baked some brownies, ran over to church to borrow some ministry stuff & talk to the new vicar (nice guy!), did some laundry, & finished some homework. okay, i lied on that last one. i'm a professional procrastinator, what can i say?!

tomorrow's agenda: NOTHING! sleeping in & a date w/ my couch & remote. very exciting for a college student. oh, the prospects of having a completely open schedule. the day is wide open for adventure or laziness. whichever comes first, i guess! actually, going on a hike tomorrow sounds really good, especially since the weather's been so nice. we'll see. . . that might be added to the day's events!

that's it. i'm tired & it's 1am. . . doing nothing sure is exhausting! ;)

blessings to all!
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p.s. i'll keep ya'll posted as to what special adventures God has for me the rest of the week!